Saturday, 7 March 2009

UnReithian TV

Here is a good game. You look through the TV listings in search of the programme that, from its title alone, would be most likely to make Lord Reith turn in his grave. Here are a few guaranteed winners (I haven’t made any of these up, you know). You will note that the makers of banal TV seem to have an addiction to using the words ‘me’ and ‘my’ in the title. I haven’t actually seen any of these programmes so it’s perfectly possible that they are shining examples of the Reithian mission to ‘inform, educate and entertain’. But I doubt it.

Help! My Dog’s as Fat as Me (BBC3)

Could You Eat an Elephant? (C4)

The World’s Hairiest Man and Me (C4)

Travels with My Beard (BBC3)

Revenge of the Bin Men (C4)

Addicted to Boob Jobs (BBC3)

Stick Thin in India (BBC3)

Squirrel Wars (C4)

Can Fat Teens Hunt? (BBC3)

Help Me Anthea, I’m Infested (BBC3)

World of Stupid Criminals (Five)

Snog, Marry, Avoid? (BBC3)

Other People’s Breast Milk (C4)

Hoodies Can Be Goodies (BBC3)

Freaky Eaters: Addicted to Spaghetti Hoops (BBC3)

Britain’s Worst Teeth (BBC3)

The Hunt for Britain’s Tightest Person (C4)

Baby-Faced Body Builders (BBC3)

Britain’s Really Disgusting Foods (BBC3)

Naked: Estate Agents (BBC3)

My Man Boobs and Me (BBC3)

Kelvin MacKenzie’s Brilliant Britain (Blighty)

PS the FT magazine does a ‘Defining Moment’ column which I write once a month. You can find it at They always have a really good picture to accompany it in the magazine, but they don’t always include it on the website, presumably for copyright reasons.

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