Funny Valentines

Seen inside a Hallmark Valentine card (which for some reason I feel the need to say was neither sent nor received by me): ‘Falling in love with you is the best thing that's ever happened to me. Whether we're laughing and enjoying each other’s company or spending quiet moments in each other's arms, the times we share are the best times in my life. Our relationship means so much to me. And I know that I could never love anyone else the way that I love you. Happy Valentine’s Day.’

The sentimental doggerel traditionally found inside Valentine’s cards is now being replaced by these strangely specific messages, which remind me of the tailor-made marriage vows used by Americans in secular weddings, and which will no doubt be over here soon as well.

STAFF, IT'S TIME TO DESKERCISE

My dad found this on the internal website at his place of work, which I think better remain anonymous:

‘Struggling to get away from your desk for a Campus Walk? Do not fear, help is here. The web-based workouts, called “Deskercise,” will allow office-based staff to build exercise into their daily routine. The exercise programmes have been devised around the themes “Stretching and Posture,” “Strength & Conditioning” and “Relaxation and Breathing”. Click on the image above or the link below to try DESKERCISE.’

Mundane quote for the day: ‘If we had a keen vision of all ordinary life it would be like hearing the grass grow and the squirrel’s heartbeat, and we should die of that roar which lies on the other side of silence.’ – George Eliot, Middlemarch